My Window on the World

Interruptions

2009-03-13T22:27:00.002-06:00

I try not to let this be a place where I come to rant. There
is usually a cool down period on topics that get me steamed. This has had about
a 12 month cooling off period, but just when the coals cool, they are given a
new blast from the blow-torch of society. In the interest of fairness, I am not
with out fault in what we are about to talk about, which as always, makes the
irritation all the more stinging.

It appears that interrupting has become a nationwide
epidemic. We feel a right to make our opinion known, and that MUST be done
right this minute. Where did this come from? You see it in on television… hear
it on talk radio… and you can bet you will find it in everyday conversations
that range from the work place, to the worship space, to… in the case tonight…
just outside the theater. 3 times,
I tried to say something relevant to the conversation, 3 times, by two
different people I was cut off. It’s rude, but we as a society have decided
that rude is good, ok, and normal.

This is an irritation for me, and unlike some of the
mysteries that raddle my brain, this one, I know the origin of. When I was
being raised, one of the fundamental values that you give each person their
turn to say what they have to say. You listen to what the person is saying, not
just hear the words coming out of their mouth. Wait a beat, and then give your
response.

Verbal interruptions are not nearly as irritating as
physical interruptions. Mind your body positioning when in a conversation with
more than one person. If there are three of you, and one person decides that
they are going to stand between the other two, with their back to one of them…
that is an interruption… that is rude.

Are we so impatient that waiting five minutes will really
ruin our day?

Is it going to be so tough to take a few breaths and have a
moment of silence between thoughts?

I didn’t think so.

Digital Vacation

2009-03-11T11:59:00.001-06:00

Many seem to find that this creation, this new virtual world, is a place where we can go to escape the real world. I know, I used it like that for many years. When I realized that this was becoming a second life, on top of my real world, I knew things had gotten out of hand. Yesterday, I deactivated my Facebook page. There are others whose pages will be taken down, but they are so minute that it is not worth mentioning by name. Suffice to say, my digital life is about to become a digital hobby.

Why? Why all this hoop-la about a digital life and an second world? Because it can be used as an escape hatch to get away from this world. We are all living a profound existence whose lessons, though sometimes apparent to one person alone, are worth more than any amount of code. Games can be fun, but not when they get in the way of life.

I am not demanding that the world do the same. Such a foolish gesture would be the very definition of arrogance and idiocy. I do, however, want to bring this to the blogsphere: How much do you spend in this new life... this digital life? Are there other things you should be doing? What chances are you missing... searching the internet landscape for "new and thrilling" pages of code?

The Next Page

2008-11-20T08:02:00.000-07:00

For some time, I have taken a leave of absence from the blogsphere. Mostly, it was because I didn't have anything to say. Most of what I was spewing on a daily basis was a cloud of liberal this, and neo-con that... but then again, this is an election year.

November the 4th has come and gone, and now, I believe that a new course is in order. A revamping and reboot of the blog. You will notice that I have kept very, very few of the posts from before. This happened for two reasons. The first, most of them were not worth salvaging. They were angry, ill-directed and inflated. The second, they were helping no one, least of all me. If this publication, digital though it may be, is going to have a future, it must be one of purpose, one that has a goal, one that speaks a message that is near to my heart. So, from this point on, I am going to try and do bi-monthly posts on topics related to inner peace. In my absence, I have found a number of fantastic books on the subject, and will be citing from two principle sources.

The first is Thich Nhat Hanh, a Zen Buddhist Master from Plum Village, France. His teachings on ecumenism, cooperation, human worth, and environmental stewardship have made him a source of light and right thought for me, a safe harbor when the storms of life get a little too serious. Poetic that this safe harbor is found in a tradition of Buddhism that is founded in the principle of laughing at how serious and crass life can be.

The second is one that I found almost by acciedent. Hastings, a local video store, has had several copies of one movie for sale for a long time now. The movie is called “Peaceful Warrior,” and is the film adaptation of the book, Way of the Peaceful Warrior by Dan Millman. In the book, and film, Millman gives a story of Millman's own personal journey of self discovery. I won't ruin the story, because it is far too good to sum up even beyond what I have done already, so please, pick up a copy of either and settle in for a good story. Millman has also expounded upon the teachings that, over the years, he has received from numerous teachers, most notably, a man named Socrates who worked in an old service station in Berkley, CA.

So, to sum up what I hope to be putting up on here for you all to read, the purpose of this blog has become clear. In the words of Plato “Be kind, for we are all on a long journey.” I hope that what I find, and share, will be of use to someone.

Until next time,

Remember... Life has just 3 rules.

Food for thought

2008-11-12T10:24:00.000-07:00

Though one may conquer
a thousand times a thousand men in battle,
yet one indeed is the noblest victor
who conquers oneself.

Dhammapada 10.103

Taking out the Trash.

2008-06-11T16:27:00.000-06:00

Many of you, who have talked to me, at any length, in the last few months, have heard me talk about Dan Millman. This is not with out reason, as Millman has written a series of books that serve as a guide into and out of the self. Also, if I have met with you or exchanged correspondence, I have probably mentioned a movie called Peaceful Warrior, an adaptation of the Millman book The Way of the Peaceful Warrior.

If this is the first you are hearing of them… then this is a special treat for you, because it’s the first step on what could be the journey of a lifetime.

The book and movie deal with a characterization of the author and a mentor that he had in the 60’s named Socrates. Both in the movie and the novel, not to spoil one of my favorite scenes,

Socrates shares a dialogue with Dan.
Socrates: “Take out the trash, Dan”
Dan: (very defensively) “YOU take out the trash!”
Soc: “The trash(he says raising a finger and poking Dan in the forehead) is up here.”

As a prelude to the whole conversation, Soc also shares “People are not theirs thoughts, they think they are, and it brings them all kinds of sadness.”

The average person has around 1000+ thoughts that blaze through their head each day, ranging from coffee to traffic to hair to shoes to air… and none of them, on average reveal any more about a person than their birth mark does. So… the advice is to take out the trash. What does this mean, how does a person take out trash they can’t even catch on to… where do you start?

Let’s begin with a few simple exercises. First, read the next few lines… because after the first line, the rest kind of becomes futile. Follow the instructions and then resume your reading.

Close your eyes.
Take a breath for the measure of 3 heart beats
hold it in for a count of 3 heart beats
release it for a count of 3 heart beats
Repeat this exercise 4 or 5 times

See, simple. You may not know it, but you just took out the trash. You were focused on the breathing, not on clothes or pets or animals, or that irritating person who was smoking outside, you were here… now… in this moment… taking out the trash.

Taking out the trash is a deceptive term, but then again, most techniques handed down from master to students in antiquity(and comical kung fu fiction) are… Tiger pets the crane… monkey climbs the building… viper dances on the fishing pole… etc… ad nausium.

The reality of taking out the trash is, as it implies, not just a notion for clearing the mind. If that were the intention, if would been called “quit making trash”. But such strategies are rather unrealistic, and if you would like a physical, real world representation of this, simply try to go a day, week or month… or hour… with out producing trash in your home. It is not only impossible, but illogical. So, instead of calling it “quit making trash”, it is called take out the trash, because that is what one does with something when it has run its natural course around the home or apartment or office, one puts it in the waste bin and removes it.

The statement above is deceptively simple… because as any college frat can attest to, just putting the trash into a waste bin is not enough, the trash must also be taken out. This is a call to change, a call to action. Telling Dan to “take out the trash” is a call to a change in behavior. Dan is your typical college kid, doesn’t sleep enough, drinks to my alcohol, eats food that is crudely prepared and contains more than just nutrients. But the most important of that is the sleep. When in a deep sleep, the brain finds rest and a chance to actually no be functioning. This same can be found in a deep meditation.

There is a proverb: “Two men looked out of prison bars; one saw mud and the other saw stars.” Poetic though the verse may be, both men are looking at either one side of life or the other. The first is quite familiar with the present, and by inflection of the text alone… the past. The second is looking hopefully toward the future, dreaming while he is awake. Neither is seeing the real blessing of the here and now. Herein lies the trouble with rampant thoughts… they take our attention from the here and now, and take it where it is not yet needed, or no longer is needed.

Awareness is the key to taking out the trash, and it can begin very simply. Pick one of the five senses right now, and give it your attention. Feel the air on your skin, the clothing on your body, the hairs on your head… the seat beneath you. Hear the clicking of the mouse, the fingers on the keyboard, the subtleties of the music that you otherwise might not have noticed, or a bird flapping its wings. Investigate every detail of what you experience, and when it is done, reflect on how often you have heard or felt these sensations before.

Socrates also had a quip for the kind of sensation that we feel when we are in the moment. Not because we have achieved some new level of understanding or cosmic power, but because a person can sense even the subtleties, and understand them. “When you are fully living in the here and now, you’ll be surprised at what you can do, and how well you can do it.”

To Live

2008-05-06T10:53:00.000-06:00

Times change, people change, ultimately nothing stays the same. We hear the quips, often eloquently related in florid prose of some fashion, but to really think about them truly takes a life time to comprehend. One person who is really good at those, a modern master of life, philosophy and guidance, is an author who I have read much of listened to a few lectures from as well. Dan Millman is a person I will quote a lot in the posts to come, mostly because he helped me understand one simple truth, to truly understand life, I believe, is to live in every moment and take notice of where we are and what we are doing.

A friend of mine is getting married this summer. We were good friends in high school, and still are, though communication is not nearly as much as it should be, due to both of us growing in very different directions. The funny thing is, when we were in high school, his mentality reflected mine of today, and vice versa. I find this very comforting, it is evidence that we are still searching, still looking for that one thing that makes us stop and take time to notice all that is around us. We are still living.

Now by that I am not saying that we are still alive. If that comes to an end, it’s just another “transformation… a bit more radical than puberty but nothing to get particularly upset about.” I mean we are still living, soaking up everything that there is to soak up on this earth(until we take to the stars in search of something more). A few months ago, I received some personal news that really made me think about life, about how in our society it has become so common place to take EVERYTHING for granted. We feel with out feeling, look with out looking, touch without touching, taste without tasting, see without seeing, think with out thinking.

We live without living.

This news set me on a sort of quest, a search for what I was missing. It wasn’t happiness; I was very peaceful where I was. What I was missing was the actual sensation of living, the awareness that I am alive.

Do you KNOW that you are alive?

Can you feel your feet in your shoes? The jeans on your thighs? The desk beneath your arms. The hair on your head? If you answered no, or simply didn’t think about it until I mentioned it… no worries, you’re a part of a much larger group than you think. These simple sensations are so ensnared in your mind (whatever the heck that is) having already set a label, and attachment to it. The thing you put your rump into at the thing that you have your computer on is a chair. The thing you get into for conveyance from A to B is a car. As a child, an infant, we found magic in the simplest things, the vivid colors of the back yard, the sensation of the carpet benath our hands and knees, the new and wonderous sights that we rediscovered everyday. We found magic in every moment.

You might ask, where is the magic in a chair? What’s so dang amazing about a car? Well, looking through my Window, I see that the chair has been one of the surviving pieces of furniture antiquity. Most historians will tell you that it started out, just as it is today, a simple plank elevated off the ground. From that it became thrones for mighty kings, a dance partner when Rocking in the Jailhouse, and even a tool of death. Yet, in all of it’s incarnations, you can still go to your local Target and get a chair that functions much like it’s humble predecessors… a creation which has existed much longer than most civilizations, and you are probably sitting on one right now.

The car? It’s thousands of moving parts and wires whose sole propulsion system(at least for those of us still in the dark ages with out a hybrid car) is gasoline! We pour this combustible substance into a heap of metal and plastic and every time we turn the key, it has the chance to do one of an infinite number of things; from explode and kill all inside to run just as smoothly as it did the day it rolled off the assembly line. Almost a hundred years of engineering since the model T, and we are now using the power of that same car to assist in making it more economic and better for the environment. That is magic, not just in the workings of the car, but the achievement of the human mind.

Change.

Life has changed, we have changed, and that’s a wonderful thing because the alternative is to grow stagnant. I can’t tell you how to live. I can only suggest a few simple things to start taking advantage of what’s already there. First thing is to wake up and take a long breath of fresh morning air when you step out the door. Crisp, fresh, new… just like your day. At some point during the day, rub your hands together very, very slowly. Feel the sensation of each bump and ripple in your skin as you come into contact with yourself. But most importantly, remind yourself about one simple truth… this moment, the one you are in right now, is the only moment that matters. The future does not exist yet… it is an endless array of infinite possibilities. The past has come and gone, you cannot change anything about it, do not dwell on the good or the bad. What we have is this moment, the here and now. “The time is now, the place is here. Stay in the present. You can do nothing to change the past, and the future will never come exactly as you plan or hope for,” Millman reminds us.

Be here… now. Live in this moment, not in reaction to the world around you, but as an active being in this world. Go out and live folks! You have to get out in the streets in your underwear; you have to talk to a stranger for no reason. Drink a Captain and Coke with breakfast! Take the ugliest person home at the party! Heck, GO to the party! Open your arms and embrace life, because you never know what it will put in your lap. Choose your actions, every moment of every day, make the choice.

Do or don’t. Don’t flounder. If you drink, drink and enjoy it. If you smoke, enjoy each cigarette. Don’t do it however, because you NEED to. There is a vast difference between acting and reacting. Addictions are a reaction on a mental or chemical level, based on dependency… but more over based on reactionary mentality and habits. I smoked for 13 years, when I figured out why, I could stop. Do I still have a cigarette occasionally, no. Why? Because I don’t enjoy them anymore.

“Every action has its price and its pleasure.” The cost of me smoking for 13 years, is catching up with me in the form of diminished lung capacity that I am overcoming. Drinking too much also has had its impact on me, in more ways than one. Do I still drink… absolutely. Why? Because I still enjoy the taste of a Captain and Coke a Jack and Sprite, or Vodka and Mountain Dew… or Tequila, straight up(most times separate from one another). I enjoy these and when I do enjoy them, because I give my attention and consider to what I am enjoying.

This is not to say that I enjoy them in Moderation. Moderation, according to Corley is telling someone who likes something to only like it so much, because after that, it can harm you. This kind of mentality is born out of fear. It is not born out of wisdom. To have it be born out of wisdom would be an internalization of all the information that we know about alcohol (kills brain cells, liver cells, and impairs judgment, and for some can become a dependency…) and realizing that when we drink we are accepting those possibilities. Millman’s take is a little harsher in tone, but still to the point. “Moderation? It's mediocrity, fear, and confusion in disguise. It's the devil's dilemma. It's neither doing nor not doing. It's the wobbling compromise that makes no one happy. Moderation is for the bland, the apologetic, for the fence-sitters of the world afraid to take a stand. It's for those afraid to laugh or cry, for those afraid to live or die. Moderation...is lukewarm tea, the devil's own brew.”

Live each moment; not in fear, deliberating about a future that has not been determined yet, nor in regret over a history which you can not change. Live each moment with purpose, and deliberate action. Take into account the price and pleasure of each moment and action, but do not get lost in them. Choose a course and go with it. You are Here. The Time is Now. Be This Moment! Live your life!

Experiencing an Experience

2006-06-02T16:42:00.000-06:00

Recently I was sitting down in a local coffee shop and I was reading though a book on Zen. It has been a book that I have been gradually reading over the last few months, and after all the running around that I had done today, I took a little time off of my feet and just spent some time reading.

I read though a section on the "Zen point of view" on when things happen in our lives. At one point in my life, I think that I would have known this but would have put a very intricately woven Catholic spin on it, so the message, rather than being new, was like opening a window on my mind and soul and feeling a breath of fresh air sweep though my body. The message, while not simple, was about as basic and synthesized as one could get. Deceptively simple, and delicately interlaced with a profoundness that can be overlooked, well at least I began to over look it.

The message: Things happen.

Yes, I know, we have taken that to a new level in a culture such as ours, by saying "Shit happens", but not all life is shit. Relationships can teach valuable lessons, even in their ending(painful and unanswered though they may seem), a chance meeting of old friends or old teachers can put a new spin on how things are seen(in this same coffee shop I encountered a former teacher, from my 7th grade year(that would be 10 years ago this fall)).

No matter the event, be it labeled good or bad, each event is an experience. We can have a bad day, a good day, a blessing or a tragedy, or we can experience an experience.

The message is that things happen in life. Our best laid plans can slip right thought our hands, but not because we did not try hard enough or because we did not think really hard on it, but simply because factors beyond those that we presently accounted for influenced an outcome. Perhaps it was in our favor; got that job, accepted to a grad program or undergrad program, she said yes to that question that makes most guys nauseous... or maybe things didn't quite go as well as we had hoped: the company downsized, didn't get into that school we wanted, a bitter and caustic conclusion to a relationship. We have experienced something in each of our daily encounters; we can fully immerse ourselves into that feeling, those emotions, pain or pleasure, joy or sorrow, grief or release, and then move on. Experience the experience, and live in the moment. Life does not exist in the future anymore than it does in the past, what we need to know, and what we need to experience is right here and right now. In the passing clouds, in playing guitar, in sipping tea, in the music we hear. Experience your experiences, don't let them slip away.